Dearest Community,

My heart has been breaking the past couple of weeks. Ferguson, Los Angeles, Salt Lake City, Gaza, Syria, Ukraine, suicide, depression, family violence. The list seems endless. Every time I turn around, some new horror has transpired, and it’s been difficult to find my equilibrium.

I’ve cried, raged and felt quite adrift. I tell myself there is a silver lining, and I’m damned if I can locate it these days.

But life goes on.

There are grants to write and meetings to attend. My friendships need tending, and the tomatoes are ready to can. Dinners need to be prepared, birthdays celebrated, and summer vacations enjoyed.

It can be challenging to hold multiple truths, and yet that’s what the world calls for now. Our survival depends on our willingness to neither succumb to the well of despair, nor lose ourselves in the netherworld of denial. We must be awake and present for what is, not just what we prefer, or what is currently making the loudest noise.

Grief and laughter, desire and repugnance, hatred and affiliation. As leaders, it’s important that we find ways to keep our balance when pulled in many directions simultaneously. One of the ways I keep mine is by reaching out. Remembering who my partners are, who loves me and whom I love.

In times like these, I find it helpful to remember my purpose – why I get up each morning – why I’m here on the planet now. It’s also helpful to remember that all things change. Today’s sorrow carries the seeds of tomorrow’s liberation. Sometimes I have to simply trust that while I can’t seem to make sense of what’s happening, the words of our brother Martin remain true — the arc of history is long, and it bends – it bends toward justice.

From my heart to yours.

Akaya
August 2014

Photo credit: Mirror image sunrise on Padarn lake by Hefin Owen.